How do Children Learn Acceptable Behavior?
Young children's motives for their behavior can derive from observing the behavioral choices of others. That is why it is crucial for parents, early childhood educators, schools, and communities to teach kids from an early age how to build a core for positive behavior. There are two child-rearing practices that help encourage children to internalize their moral value and prosocial judgement (Miller, 2016, p.228):
"Nurturing and affectionate adult guidance."
"Consistency in explaining reasons for rules and expectations"
Building a child's moral intelligence can't be done without knowing American psychologist Lawrence Kohlberg's Theory of Moral Development. Kohlberg's theory is broken down into three primary levels: Preconventional Morality (stages 1 and 2), Conventional Morality (stages 3 and 4 ) and Postconventional Morality (stages 5 and 6). Each primary level has two stages, which makes a total number of six stages. Although it is important to learn all six stages, early childhood educators should focus on the first two:
Stage One (Obedience and Punishment) :
Obeying the rules is important because it's a way t0 avoid punishment
(Miller, 2016, p.230)
Stage Two (Individualism and Exchange):
The child observes the and judges an individual's actions based on how
serve their prosocial needs. (Miller, 2016, p.230)
By knowing Kohlberg's theory, it will be easier for teachers to introduce socially acceptable behavior to their students. Some ways you can model good manners and positive behavior is by being a role model yourself; praise or maybe even reward them with a small token of appreciation if they behave well; and positively guide them to the right direction . Preschoolers are still learning how to express their feelings. Teaching them how to use appropriate vocabulary will help prevent them from resorting to negative behavior.
Will you Take an Adult-Centered or Child-Centered View of Misbehavior?
When a child misbehaves, it means that they are acting in a manner that is "inappropriate, troublesome, and sometimes unsafe. For example, when a child throws a tantrum because he can't play outside yet; that is a form of misbehavior. All of us have needs and if they aren't being met, that is one of the main reasons as to why young children act out of line. As I mentioned in the previous paragraph, they often lack the ability to properly explain how they feel. Most of the time, they act cranky if they are tired, hungry or bored. The other reasons why children misbehave is because they want to seek your attention; they have strong emotions; or they want independence (Pennsylvania State Extension, 2004)
To discipline young children who are displaying negative behavior, I believe that I should focus on having a child-centered view of misbehavior. Having an adult-centered view is self-centered because it doesn't take into account the child's needs which would make it difficult for them to learn how to be responsible for the consequences of their actions (Miller, 2016, p.235). We as adults should learn how to be understanding and empathetic towards their mistakes. Keep note that none of us are perfect. You can't place high expectations on how children should behave without doing your part. Being considerate to a child who has misbehaved can be used as an opportunity for you to teach them how to make better choices!
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